Déjà Vu


“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.” ~ Joseph Campbell
I remember the goals I wished to accomplish by the time I was 25. I wanted to visit all 50 States, all 6 (inhabited) continents, be married and have my first child, and be settled in my career – to name a few.

Seems like a lot for a 25 year old but when I made these goals (when I was 18) they didn’t seem so implausible. Back then I had a schedule for every second of my life, and these goals fit into it perfectly.

There was one major unscheduled event and one unfathomable twist that completely altered my course of history and has set me where I am today. The event was going to Grad School in London and the twist was falling in love. For those who knew me pre 2006 you know that I didn’t care about anything, anyone, or anywhere and I was going to get what I wanted when I wanted it and no one was going to stand in my way. After I grew a heart everything changed and the book I had set my life to seemed to fall apart.

I have spent the last few months trying to figure out how to get back on track with my plans, readjusting of course, and deciding that enough was enough…

A couple of weeks ago I moved into my new place in the South of London and as I unpacked my things and set them on the shelf I had a sudden case of Déjà Vu. Now considering that I move constantly you may think… well duh! But it was something very specific about this moment. The exact shelf with it’s cloth enclosure, the exact layout of the room, and the time of the year all fit in perfectly. I dreamt this, and I dreamt it exactly one year ago when I was living in Amsterdam. Now that I think about it… this happened then too…

Holy Moses… it did happen then as well… I remember dreaming about having a very specific conversation with my 2 cousins (who I hadn’t seen in over ten years) while I was still living in St. Louis and when I moved to Amsterdam it actually happened. What’s even more interesting is that my cousins moved to Amsterdam just before I did, I had no clue they were going to be there and so when it did actually happen I was utterly surprised. I spoke with my very religious aunt (their mother) who agreed that these things happen and are a sign that we are where we’re meant to be. My time in Amsterdam was rather difficult but knowing this piece of information made it a bit more bearable and looking back on it now I see exactly why I had to be there and how it has placed me where I am today.

Anyway back to the present… After having the Déjà Vu the other day I had a total sense of calm, I looked around and just muttered to myself:

“Okay…”
Déjà Vu Déjà Vu Reviewed by Unknown on 18:39 Rating: 5

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